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Homecoming
Dance: Readers take the Floor on Missionary Homecomings, Homework,
Housework and Housewives
Edited and compiled by Kathy
Green
OSC On the Job
http://www.meridianmagazine.com/ideas/061012homework.html
Homework: The Worst Job in the World,
by Orson Scott Card
Loved it! This is my soapbox right
now! I'm trying to be brave enough to share my thoughts with my
youngest son’s teacher. We are on harvest break & she sent
a packet of homework assignments home for him to do each day of
the break. I guess 2nd graders don't get a break. It's my big
“grrrr”! And we are both annoyed at "homework time"
each day.
Stephenie Moore
St. Anthony, Idaho
**
Having raised three children to adulthood
and now have grandchildren in the public schools, I agree that homework
is just that — busy work. I can't tell you how many "projects"
I have "helped" by children do through the years. I probably
learned much more than they did — I'm sure I did because they just
wanted to get it done! Maybe schools are trying to educate the
parents! A big burden was lifted off of my shoulders when I went
to my last child's parent-teacher conference and I knew that there
were NO more! It's not that I disliked the conferences or that my
children were bad, but it meant that I was almost done with homework!
I don't disagree with having the children
read for a few minutes each night, as books help children get away
from their everyday world and imagine and think on their own.
Math was never my strong subject, so
when math homework came home (every night, without end), we would
struggle for hours with problems in algebra and then find out we
had done the problems all wrong. If the kids don't understand it
in class, what makes the teachers think they'll understand it at
home! Don't get me on the subject of algebra and whomever it is
that writes those books that only a nuclear scientist can understand!
The teachers always told me that my girls would eventually “get
it” when their brains matured. Right?!
I think this article should be sent
to every school district in the country. The points made are very
valid!
Jan White
West Valley City, Utah
**
I have to agree with the author. I
have an 11-year-old seventh grader who hates school because of his
math teacher. I sat with him just last night to help with his homework
and was utterly amazed at the level of homework assigned. The first
six problems were something that my child could grasp. The remainder
of the handout was way beyond the level of a seventh grader. This
math teacher loves math and wants his students to love math too.
However, all he is accomplishing, with my child at least, is hatred
for math. I'm at my wits’ end trying to figure out how to motivate
my child to at least like school in order to get through it.
So, I say bravo to the author
for recognizing there is a problem in America.
Gwen Vineyard
Redlands, California
**
This is so true! I have tried to convince
myself that all this stupid homework had some redeeming value.
Mr. Card points out exactly what I knew down deep — it doesn't and
it is ruining our families!
When you add to this the ever-increasing
requirements of sports and music in the schools you have majorly
overstressed youth who are on the verge of burnout. I keep telling
myself, "We are killing these kids;" and I don't know
what to do about it. I hound my children to keep up with the requirements
others are placing on them. I am participating in their "abuse"
so to speak.
I sure hope he has answers in the second
part of his article. I am anxiously and eagerly waiting to read
it.
By the way, add to all that he wrote
the fact that my 14-year old son is also severely dyslexic and it
is nothing short of a miracle that he has not given up, and still
continues to plod along at school and life each day!
.
Sharon Johnson
Flower Mound, Texas
**
Bravo! Bravo! I can't wait for the
conclusion of this article. I wish every teacher and parent could
read it. Thank you Meridian for including this type of article.
Shauna Broderick
Bountiful, Utah
**
This article by Orson Scott Card was
wonderful!
It opened my eyes to my own folly of
believing the merits of homework.
I actually saw myself in his article
being the "at home task master" whose first words after
work would always be "are you done with your homework?"
I laughed out loud while reading the
examples of worthless "projects" which I had to spend
more time finishing for my children then the time I could have spend
"with" my children doing things we all enjoy.
Thank you for waking me up from decades
of mistaken beliefs on the importance of homework.
I can now see that our children are
NOT failing — it's our education system that's failing.
Grace Chen
Bountiful, Utah
**
You have managed to put into words
what I have been thinking and trying to express for a while! My
children have homework after homework after homework. When I went
to parent night all the teachers talked about was the EOG (end of
grade testing).
They presented several different reading
programs and then several different math programs. After hearing
about all the programs, I was exhausted. I couldn't imagine going
through school again. At my children's school they have a program
called Accelerated Reading. They have only certain books that “qualify”
and only those books earn the children points. So basically they
are creating children who love points instead of children who love
books and reading. I couldn't see a pointless priority.
Thank you so much for compiling all
this info! I look forward to reading the second part.
Katrina Bell
North Carolina
**
In the throes of grappling with the
problems of schoolwork that Brother Card describes so well, I noted
this parenthetical sentence which, at first blush, excludes the
school his youngest daughter attends from his biting commentary:
Let me say right here that in this
school year, so far, our only remaining school age child has not
been overburdened with homework. This essay is not about my particular
schoolchild's current situation. It's about homework in general,
across America.
At second thought, Card possibly points
out one of the reasons the problem of excessive homework and meaningless
task-oriented schoolwork continues in today's educational system.
Might the parents —and I'm one of them — outwardly feel that though
American kids in general are being over-burdened with unnecessary
and unhelpful work, also feel that their individual child is not
being sufficiently challenged? Is that the reason parents feel the
pang to support all that work and can't allow their child to turn
down an extra credit assignment? I feel the same outrage Brother
Card describes when I read the studies and listen to the reports,
and then also feel the need to push my 6th grade son to complete
all his homework and ask to check his work before he turns it in.
My son's school has a 1-hour homework
policy, which on the face of it sounds perfectly humane. If a child
has worked steadily on an assignment (or a group of assignments)
for an entire hour, the school allows a parent to make a notation
of the time worked on the assignment and he or she is done working
for the night. But I've never heard of a parent actually making
that mark! I don't know about other homes, but in our house we
ask our son to go ahead and finish his work because it is still
required. He's not excused from the unfinished work; and by the
end of the week we might accumulate several hours of homework to
be completed on the weekend, although all of it is past due to the
teacher.
I agree with the studies, and want
my son to have a happy and pressure-free school experience, just
like every other parent. But I wonder if I can do it! And that
might just be the root of the problem after all.
Jackie Mitchell
Gurnee, Illinois
**
After putting two daughters through
Paradise Valley School System in Arizona, I believe the homework
is intended to be a supplement to the teacher's failure to control
the classroom.
Both girls came home with daily stories
about uncontrollable students, the complete disruption of the classroom
environment, and the teacher's inability to control the class.
We have needed harsh disciplinary tactics
for disruptive students for a very long time. Go to a Catholic School
and see how the classes are run. No comparison.
We need to focus our attention on giving
the teachers the power to remove (permanently if necessary) disruptive
kids. I guarantee you that the homework would be reduced if there
was better control in the classroom with a learning environment.
Don Crays
San Clemente, California
**
I agree completely! We have been struggling
with this issue and are still battling it. I’m looking forward to
Part 2.
Barry Hansen
Orem, Utah
**** **** **** ****
Season to Taste
http://www.ldsmag.com/articles/061009conference.html
Powering Our Lives with General Conference
Year Round, by Debra Sansing Woods
Thank you so very much for these inspiring
thoughts on how to continually enjoy the conference messages. I
loved President Monson's words at the end of the Sunday session
when he said, "We hate to bring this spiritual feast to a close
(obviously a slight revision of his words)."
I felt the same. We had family visiting
with us here in Missouri. We had shared Nauvoo, the Temple, Adam-ondi-Ahman,
Far West, and conference. It was such a privilege.
Several years ago I spent a week studying
a talk by Brother David Haight. It had been a short talk, and I
was amazed, as I spent the time to really study it, at the wealth
of spiritual insight Brother Haight had expounded in that short
talk which one hearing had not brought out for me.
When Brother Bednar gave that magnificent
talk on "the tender mercies of the Lord," I had the opportunity,
the next month, to hear a blind sister teach about it in Relief
Society in a ward where I was visiting. I was so grateful that
I had carefully studied it before I heard her. What tender truth
and love I felt and received. I once heard a Relief Society lesson
encouraging the sisters to read the lessons before coming to the
class, according to the belief that we get out of something what
we bring to it.
I had made a plan yesterday on how
I could really study every talk from this conference, and your article
has strengthened my desire and plan to make this happen.
Thank you for this reinforcement.
Vivian Rogers
Kirksville, Missouri
**** **** **** ****
Chasing the Bluebird
http://www.meridianmagazine.com/myth/000829happiness.html
Happiness — Just Over the Next Hill?
by H. Wallace Goddard
Thank you so much for this reminder.
You really uplifted my spirit.
I get setbacks that really sting at
times but I needed this reminder. We all have trials. We need to
keep the right attitude.
I will strive to be happy —even when
there is more lemon than sugar in my life's lemonade.
Kathy Blose
Las Vegas, Nevada
**** **** **** ****
It’s a Date
http://www.ldsmag.com/churchhistory/061011OliverCowdery.html
Remembering Oliver Cowdery by Judy
Done
Excellent article! I really enjoyed
reading the abbreviated version. Not much of what was printed was
new to me; however, I found it very interesting the amount of time
it took him to get rebaptized. I always assumed he was rebaptized
during or immediately following the Kanesville, Iowa Church Conference
in April 1848; however, your noted baptized date is Nov. 12, 1848.
Apparently, his road to full repentance took longer to be complete.
I loved the picture of the portrait of him as an attorney. Thanks
again for sharing. I found the article very interesting!
Mark Urry
Escondido, California
**** **** **** ****
You’ll Never Walk Alone
http://www.ldsmag.com/articles/061010divorce.html
After Divorce: A Life Still Sublime,
by Kathryn Jenkins
Thanks for publishing Kathryn's article.
She was our neighbor at the time of this divorce. We grieved for
her and her family. Kathryn is one of the most Christ-like women
out there — a true gem.
Please let her know that the ward and
neighborhood love and miss her.
O.K. (and Iris) Meservy
**
I cannot begin to tell you the impact
that this article had on me. I too went through something very
similar to what Kathryn experienced. I have struggled with the
same feelings — good and bad.
The last half of this article was an
answer to prayer. I needed to hear that it is okay to enjoy what
I have even if I don’t have someone to share it with. My heart
aches for my ex-husband every time that I spend time with my children
and grandson because I think about what he is missing.
I need to spend less time thinking
about what he is missing and spend more time enjoying what I have
right there in front of me. I know in my heart that I am not alone
— not really. I just so appreciate the way that Kathryn expressed
these feelings in her article.
Joan Nielsen
Salt Lake City, Utah
**
Wow! What a beautiful, powerful message!
What you have shared in this article
will be an inspiration to many souls. We just recently spoke at
the North West Regional Singles Conference in Spokane, and met some
of the choicest people we've ever met, many who cry out in the agony
of divorce. I wish I could tell each one about your inspiring article.
I loved your statement, "I may not be able to feel the warmth
of a foot under the patchwork quilt, but I can feel the warmth of
the Spirit all around me, protecting me in a way that no mortal
ever could." I think I'll forward the article on to their
leader who has their email addresses and can then get it to them.
Thank you for sharing. And with such
eloquence! You are a terrific writer. Once I started reading I
was spellbound.
With much appreciation for your testimony
and talent,
Joy Lundberg
Provo, Utah
**
I read this article because, as you
might guess, I am facing the same situation right now. Although
the addiction is sex rather than drugs, the outcome of the marriage
is the same. "Misery loves company" — proven by the fact
that I enjoyed reading about Kathryn's experience. :)
Although my emotions were not at the
level hers were with the loneliness, sadness, emptiness, etc, I
do have intense feelings of anger, and disappointment for thoughts
and dreams that will never come to fruition. I do often feel largely
"adrift." I have no work to go to so as to lose myself
each day, and no mother to cry with (she is on a mission in India
with my dad). I have stressful, guilt-filled thoughts when I try
to make decisions that will change the way life is for the children
right now.
Should I go to work full-time to make
enough money to keep the house, and to get insurance for the kids
and me? Should I say at home and "be at the crossroads"
for them? How will my two boys be able to go on the AFHS band tour
this fall? Can I sign my 5- year old daughter up for soccer? I
mean, is that ok for someone who gets food from the Bishop's Storehouse
every two weeks? How will I pay for my son's mission next November?
I keep saying "I'd rather lose the house than lose the kids,"
but it seems I forgot to include "lose my mind" in there
somewhere.
My favorite part of the article was
the quote by Anne Morrow Lindbergh. Oh how very much I can relate
to that, and how much more I hope I can say as Kathryn did, "Patience
and faith. They are the qualities I have finally developed. They
are the qualities that kept me afloat. They are the qualities that
made me understand that, though I may still at times be in the sea,
I am not adrift."
Name Withheld
American Fork, Utah
**
Your article rocked me! ME TOO!
My temple marriage ended in the year
after my son's suicide. Drug abuse was a subtle factor in the break
up of our marriage. He functioned, but regularly took prescription
drugs — not prescribed to him.
I didn't understand the significance
of that until later.
My second marriage ended this year
due to his ongoing transgression and betrayal of his covenants.
The marriage was undertaken while I was still recovering from my
son's death and the end of my temple marriage, so I really was not
ready — and he was not honorable.
As time goes by, my awareness grows
of the depth of his dishonesty. Oh well! Free agency!
Still, the sublime. I have drawn close
to our Father in Heaven and have felt his love for me. And most
recently, I have felt my love for Him grow and deepen. My trust
of Him has grown. I love the gospel of Jesus Christ. I am healed
through His wondrous atonement.
Yup, I'm not married, but I am working
out my Salvation; striving to be more holy, trying each day to ask,
"What would Thou have me do?"
Yes, it is sublime.
Leah Thornley
Sumner, Washington
**
It's about time for an article like
this to go into print. I too was broad-sided one Saturday morning
by an announcement my husband made. He got up and left. I was still
emotionally attached and in love with him. I went into shock also.
As in the article like Kathryn's husband, my husband had planned
it for years. The kids had left the nest years before and there
were 8 grandchildren. I had just retired from teaching.
Before the conclusion and final divorce
paper work was finished, he was engaged and building a home for
his new wife. He had planned the divorce for several years and had
planned his debt to be factored into the divorce settlement to include
a new Harley, new car and taking out his 401 K to be given to his
two favorite sons from another marriage. There was nothing I could
do. I was the one sued, since I had savings, a 401 K and a new retirement
income. I even had major surgery of a total knee, during the middle
of the divorce.
As in this wonderful article, I found
strength the same way Kathryn did. I understood her words and her
story. I too have lived this nightmare as she has. I have felt her
pain and her joy. I'm on the mend as Kathryn now is It wasn't how
I was suppose to go into retirement, getting divorced, having a
new knee, starting all over knowing my temple marriage had been
turned into a mockery, by the man I had loved so much.
I bonded with this article and have
so much in common with Kathryn. I would love to meet her and talk
to her. We are truly sisters in so many ways. I thank her for this
article.
How sad this is happening to older
sisters, when it should be the grandest time of our lives to enjoy
and reap the harvest of those years of having given so much to that
special love of our lives; our husband.
Not that I will ever have closure on
the death of my marriage; but I am grateful to see this story, so
similar to mine, printed. It does help to validate what I have been
through and the new life I'm starting over, even though I'm retired
and 60.
Kathryn and I are the little trains
of life, that think they can. Please let Kathryn know how much it
has meant to me to read her story. She is not alone in this aspect,
but there is one lady in Lubbock, Texas that respects her greatly,
and thinks of her as a close, loving sister in the spirit of this
article.
Yvonne Ginter,
Lubbock Texas
**
Kathryn has perfectly described the
feelings thousands of us wish we could express so well. I remember
being surprised by the physical pain of the separation, as though
a part of me had been cut out. That was followed by my being left
out of social activities —perhaps others thought divorce was somehow
catching, like a plague. This of course reinforced the sense of
abandonment and loss of self esteem: If my husband and friends didn't
want me, why would the Lord? In fact, wasn't their abandonment
evidence of His own?
I thank Him for his patience with me,
then and now. It took years to get here, but now I know that the
sunrise that awaits me every morning over Mount Olympus is His personal
gift to me. I have shared it with others, but I know it's really
just mine, to assure me He's there and still loves me. Kathryn may
share the raspberries, but they're really just for her — a sweet
assurance of His eternal love.
Evelyn
Riverton, Utah
**
I wish to thank the author for sharing
this story. Our son went through a similar experience too lengthy
to tell about here but I am sure that many parents and extended
families of such sad divorces have similar feelings as we have had.
It is not just the spouse and children who are hurt by these deceptions,
but all who love this family.
As grandparents we have not been allowed
to see the children, even though a federal law exists that states,
"Grandparents have a right to see their grandchildren."
The attorneys stated, "Utah does not pay much attention to
that law."
Our hearts have been saddened immensely
by all this, but we do not have money enough to give to attorneys
and still have any to live on.
I would love to meet this lovely woman
who wrote this story. My heart goes out to her.
Emlee
**
That was a wonderful, beautiful, uplifting
article. I am not divorced, but have watched the devastating effects
of it on those around me. Thank you for writing such an honest
yet hopeful article.
One thing people (who leave their families)
don't understand is the far reaching effect it has on extended family,
friends, neighbors and ward members. It is devastating to everyone.
My husband served as bishop when one of his counselors, a wonderfully
respected person chose to leave his wife and large family. He will
never understand the tears of sorrow, frustration and pain that
were shed in his and his family’s behalf. People truly grieved
for his poor choices and betrayal.
Best wishes and good luck to Kathryn
as she bravely and happily continues on with her life.
Name withheld by request
**
I have been reading this magazine for
many years. I really enjoy the articles. I have never made a
comment about an article before. This article just took my breath
away! It was so real to me. I felt the agony and pain all over
again!
Kathryn Jenkins could have written
this story about my life. Almost four years ago I began going through
a bitter divorce. I had just turned 50 and the divorce papers were
served on the day of our 22nd anniversary.
Thank goodness life does go on and
it does get sweeter if we stay close to our Heavenly Father. He
has now blessed me with a wonderful husband who is more than I could
have ever expected.
I never realized how wonderful a marriage
can be with a worthy priesthood holder. I never dreamed that anyone
could love me and treat me as he does. And to think I thought life
was over. I cried (sobbed) every day for eight months. It took
me a while to realize, though my family and friends kept telling
me, that the best thing my husband ever did for me was to leave
me. Slowly but surely I could see that there was hope, and life
could and would go on.
I hope this article will touch the
hearts of those who need to show love, friendship and compassion
to those who are going through a divorce. It is a hard thing to
experience — but I learned to rely on the Lord. I knew
no matter what, He would never leave me alone. I knew when I was
lonely, He would be there to comfort me.
Darlene
Idaho
**** **** **** ****
Rain on the Homecoming Parade
http://www.ldsmag.com/articles/061004tendermercy.html
My Son Came Home Early from His Mission:
Becoming a Tender Mercy of the Lord
Three months ago I came home after
serving a four-month mission. I was honorably released for medical
reasons and I knew in my heart that I was doing the Lord's will
and my mission was not over, but was just changing.
It was still hard. I didn't receive
the hearty welcome that other returned missionaries receive. I
never was asked to report to the stake high council, I was never
asked to speak with a high councilman, and I was never even asked
to speak in my home ward. I did not realize how much these little
things truly affected me until I read the article. It really hurt
to know that I had served all the time the Lord had ever planned
for me to serve and then come home to be treated as though I was
not a worthy returned missionary. I wonder if I'm not asked to
speak with a high councilman and do all the other normal returned
missionary things because I am not considered a good example of
a returned missionary for having come home early.
Thankfully, I have been deeply blessed
in this experience by the Lord and my support from Him has made
up for any lack of support received elsewhere. I do not harbor
any ill will.
Thank you to the author who was willing
to share his personal experience. I needed to be reminded also that
we need to love and not judge.
Name Withheld
**
Whether we want to admit it or not,
each ward of the Church has its share of members who have made serious
life mistakes. I imagine that we all know about a priesthood leader
who had an affair; a young man who struggles with an addiction;
a mother who screams at her kids; a young teenage girl who dresses
to attract male attention; a man who struggles with pornography;
the man in your ward who divorced one of your friends and then married
another; the young man who never went on a mission; and yes, the
young man who left on a mission and came home far too early.
Our reaction to them can affect whether
they stay active in the Church and overcome any weaknesses they
may have, or whether they go inactive because they feel they are
no longer welcome to attend church. One thing we can and must learn
from our modern world is not to be judgmental of others.
Unless your calling requires you to
pass judgment (you're a bishop, stake leader), it really isn't up
to you to judge your fellow member.
How sad it would be if any of these
members left the Church and spent the rest of their lives inactive
because someone came up to them and said, “I can't believe you have
the nerve to show your face in this church after what you have done!"
How wonderful it would be if we could
simply go up to each of the members described above and give them
a hug or shake their hand, and say to them, "I'm glad that
you're here with us today in church. This is where you belong."
Dave Lohr
Bel Air, Maryland
**
Twelve years ago this fall my daughter
told me she was going to marry a young man whom she had met but
we did not know. Shortly before she married him she told us that
he had come home early from his mission. She has never shared with
us why he came home early, but I was definitely concerned. Not
going on a mission I understood; but coming home early I didn't.
I shared my deep concern but she had
made up her mind and they were married. They were married in the
temple. The years have passed and rarely do I think about this
any more. He has been a good husband to our daughter and a good
father to their children. He is also a thoughtful son-in-law.
I know that if I would need his help in any way he would be willing
to give it.
He goes to church regularly and studies
the gospel. I have had many gospel conversations with him. I think
coming home early from his mission must have been very difficult
for him.
I had another daughter who married
a returned missionary, who appeared to be the kind of young man
that any mother would want for her daughter. He was not a good
husband. He didn't treat my daughter with kindness and their marriage
fell apart.
We need to remember that even in the
instances when someone makes a mistake that there is the principle
of repentance. In the next few years I will have grandsons who
will be old enough to serve missions. I hope they will decide to
go. I will actively encourage them, but if they decide not to,
I will know that not all is lost
How can there even be a question about
how to treat any “honorably released” missionary? It was an honorable
release! The really tricky ones are the missionaries who come home
in less-than honorable circumstances. We’ve had both in our wards
and extended family over the years.
That is the real test of our Christ-like
skills. The whole family is wounded and tender. The former missionary
may not even be willing to come to church. Yes, our norms do help
us to regulate our lives, but mistaking them for an equation like
“X, therefore Y” is a big fallacy. It is so very important that
the person who returns early from a mission be loved and fellowshipped
so that the past doesn’t dictate the future. Our lives should always
be oriented toward progress. Dwelling on the past, and particularly
labeling forever (“failed missionary”) is just a way to stop progress.
Judy Kay Frome
Las Vegas, Nevada
**
I can only say amen to this article.
I have a son who struggled with the Scouting program in our ward
when he was growing up. There were no boys his age that he connected
with and every week it was a battle to get him to Wednesday night
activities. The fight would start on Monday and go until Wednesday
evening.
I still remember that cold winter evening
as we stood in the kitchen for the hundredth time arguing why he
had to go. This beautiful young man stood there with tears in
his eyes his chin jutted out and these were his words to me, "Do
you mean to tell me that if I don't become an Eagle Scout, I can't
go to the Celestial Kingdom?" The battle was over. I had to
take him in my arms and reply "No son, No!"
That son still has a testimony. He
isn't active at this time. As a young man he was "judged"
because he never could get with the Scout program. He is a wonderful
person and the day he comes back there won't be much to repent for
because he lives a clean, good life and I never hear him judging
others.
My prayer is for us as members of the
Lord’s Church will follow the council of the prophet and learn to
be a little kinder, and love a little more.
Joyce
Alaska
**
For members who have not experienced
this situation first-hand, this is so kindly written. There are
as many types of mission experiences as there are missionaries.
Because missionaries are human beings — not yet perfected — their
experiences are sometimes uplifting and sometimes challenging to
the core of their spirits. It is important that the family of a
returning missionary listen respectfully to both the positives and
the negatives, and at the same time reinforce to the returning missionary
that his public statements need to emphasize the positive experiences.
Because they stay so busy, most missionaries
need time when they return to reflect upon their experiences and
put them into perspective. Most missionaries come home with mixed
feelings about their missions.
I would only add the comment of my
oldest son, whose wise mission president sent him home many years
ago for mental health treatment: "It's really much harder
to feel the Spirit when you are in the grip of a mental illness."
It is important for our youth to get
the mental and physical health assistance that they need, so that
they will be strong for the future missions of life. Many of our
youth have no prior indication of health problems, prior to their
missions.
A mission may be the "best two
years of your life" — but our loving Heavenly Father judges
each of us on the totality of life, not just the mission years.
Shouldn't we try to see one another through His eyes?
I am sure you will receive many appreciative
comments for this fine article. Thank you!
Name Withheld by request
**
What a well-written article. And one
we all need to hear. Who are I to judge — when but for the Grace
of God there go I? And I applaud those who have the strength to
retain their activity in the Church in spite of the self-righteous
around them. They give me hope. Our job here is to cheer each other
on. Not tear one another down.
Stephanie Summers
Tucson, Arizona
**
What if your son had not come home
from his mission honorably? Then what? How would you have responded?
Would you still have run to him with open arms? Some go into the
mission field with unresolved sin and come home early because they
finally have the courage to confess. Others come home early because
they succumb to temptation while in the field. They are not honorably
released.
Perhaps the children of our Heavenly
Father who come home "dishonorably" need even more love
than your son needed. They need even more encouragement to help
them press forward with a firm steadfastness in Christ as they go
through the repentance process. It is not easy, but it can be done.
It is truly humbling to know that the
atonement of Jesus Christ is for all of us. We all fall short of
the glory of God. Please know that I'm happy your son came home
honorably. But I am even happier that someone very special in my
life is becoming whole again after a "dishonorable" release
from his mission over a year ago. Last month he partook of the sacrament
for the first time in over a year. Soon he will have his temple
recommend back. Repentance is the most beautiful tender mercy of
the Lord. Because of Jesus Christ we can all be welcomed home into
the arms of our Father if we will repent — something we all need
to do.
May the Lord continue to bless you
in your endeavors to serve him.
Diana Gourley
West Jordan, Utah
**** **** **** ****
Let No One Shirk
http://www.ldsmag.com/athome/061009today.html
Do Today's Work Today, by Daryl Hoole
Excellent article! All LDS women need
to understand the importance of good home management and be encouraged
to use their time and abilities to create an environment conducive
to the Spirit. I struggle personally with housework while I watch
others breeze through it. I do love cooking and do my best to offer
my family good, balanced and delicious meals on a daily basis.
With housework, unnaturally as it may
come to me, I never give up, knowing that I am laying the foundation
of my children's future habits. It is my job to train them to live
in a clean, orderly place. It is article like these that motivate
me to try a little harder, knowing there are little pockets of time
that I can manage better to achieve what should be a temple-like
atmosphere of order and cleanliness where the Spirit can dwell.
Please keep motivating us!
W. Rojas
Texas
**** **** **** ****
Balm of Gilead
http://www.ldsmag.com/articles/061006tears.html
Gifts of Tears and Scriptures by Darla
Isackson
I was very interested in this article
as I just stopped taking Lexapro myself. I have been very weepy,
sometimes not knowing why. I also have been happy to cry again;
I dislike crying so much.
It was nice to go through a week/month
and feel happy and not crying over everything and anything. I loved
the analogy of sorrow and joy — feeling one while the other was
sleeping. For me, one side effect of being off Lexapro is that I
am more critical and irritable. I dislike this very much.
But I will work on these traits through
the atonement. I am also on another anti-depressant, Wellbutrin,
which seems to allow me to feel my emotions. These medications have
given me a normal life after feeling depressed for many years. I
am so thankful for them and so sad for people who suffer and won't
give them a try. I am also puzzled by the concept so common among
church members that it is more righteous not to take them and more
righteous to take anything that is "natural." There are
many natural things that can kill you!
I also appreciate knowing that it is
a common thing not to cry for awhile after a death or other sorrow.
My father died 18 months ago and I really did not cry much. Then
my dog died 4 months after that. I sobbed for a week and spent 2
hours one morning howling like a banshee. And I mean that quite
literally. At first I felt puzzled that I would cry more for my
dog than my father, but soon realized that the two were intertwined
as he loved that dog very much. Then 8 months after that my mother-in-law
died.
I am so thankful for the gospel, which
gives us an eternal perspective. Through all the sorrow there were
also many moments of joy: the two sides of the coin.
Mj
St. Louis
**
What a great article, I sniffled and
blew my nose. Tears fell. The article is truly a hidden gift in
a time of need not only for me but for friends I hold dear in my
heart. It is so sad that we who have the Gospel in our lives have
found that antidepressants need to be our band-aids for a while,
but yet it is true, God gave scientists the knowledge to bring forth
medications that will help us when we are bleeding emotionally and
when we use these medications and slowly remove them from our lives,
one layer at a time and utilize the Scriptures along w/the removal
of these medical bandages, then we have what we need to get through
to the next day.
If we all could have a husband to give
us the comfort blessings we need, but when we don't, we must rely
wholly and wholeheartedly, upon that which the Savior gave us, His
atonement and the Scriptures.
You quoted one of my favorite authors,
Kahlil Gibran. I used to read his books years ago and think it
is time to pull them out of storage. A wise man! Then the quotes
from Psalms and 2nd Kings: blessings of recognition. Where would
we be without the Scriptures, without the Savior? Alone and without
direction. God bless you for writing this article. It is beautiful.
Alana Rhodes
Tooele, Utah
**
Please thank Darla Isackson for such
a wondering article! Many times we forget just how cleansing tears
can be when we are going through a rough patch in our life. How
uplifting scriptures can be when we ask the Lord for guidance from
them, then go to where He directs us so we can get the healing,
and comfort that we need instead of just reading them to “check
them off our to-do list.”
April Norville
Washington, DC
**** **** **** ****
Stocking Stuffers
http://www.ldsmag.com/arts/060922bee.html
Akeelah and the Bee — A Story
of Transformation, by Orson Scott Card
I was not aware of this movie. It did
not play in this city. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for
bringing this to my attention. I am putting it on my Christmas list
for the Grandchildren.
Thomas P Murphy
Redstone Arsenal, Alabama
**** **** **** ****
Ever Onward
http://www.meridianmagazine.com/exstories/040129circle.html
Full Circle: The Story of a Very
Personal Rescue, by Maurine Jensen Proctor
Thank you for sharing this touching
story. It has lifted my spirits with courage and knowledge to press
onward.
Ida Wilson
Salt Lake City, Utah
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