Steven Covey once said, “There are three constants in life: change, choice, and principles.” Some of us, myself included, often think it would be much nicer if the constants in life were happiness, easy church callings, and good Christmas presents.

Change is often unwelcome and uncomfortable; choice is often much more difficult than it seems when other people are doing it, and principles are just so unbending sometimes.

Despite this, I believe that the Lord puts these constants in our paths to help us become much better than we ever could have been. He knows that we need change and choice to help us grow and also to help us recognize and live by the principles. My wife and I have found this to be true. Recent events in our lives have really helped us to recognize that change and choice are things that will help us, but it wasn't easy.

A couple of years ago, Rachelle and I decided we wanted to have another baby. We already had two, but our youngest (a daughter named Kaiya), was approaching three years old and my wife was starting to forget the torture we endured when dealing with our first two colicky babies.

The Wilkinson family — Jayson, Rachelle, big brother Riley and little sister Kaila.

With our first two children, getting pregnant was easy. This time, however, things were different. After several months of trying, we realized something was wrong and decided to see the doctor. The doctor determined that Rachelle was not ovulating and prescribed a couple of different medications to help.

After several months of taking these medications, however, things still didn't seem to be working right, so our doctor sent us to a fertility specialist. The specialist recommended we try using injectable fertility drugs in combination with an IUI (intrauterine insemination). Doing this treatment required that Rachelle give herself shots every night. She had to do it by herself because I was not brave enough to give her the shots or even watch her give them to herself.

The procedure was successful and we found out that we were pregnant! We knew there was some risk of multiples associated with doing this type of infertility treatment so we were bracing ourselves for twins. The doctor had informed us that we had a twenty percent chance for twins and a five percent chance of triplets.

When we visited the fertility doctor to do an ultrasound and see how things were coming, I watched as the doctor moved the probe over some various unrecognizable blobs. He had kind of a worried look on his face so I was a little nervous that something was wrong. After a few minutes, he looked at Rachelle, held up five fingers, and said, “Five.”

Week 11 ultrasound - Click to Enlarge

Rachelle yelled, “Five?”

The doctor began explaining his recommendation for this type of situation, which was to reduce to twins. He began going over some of the very negative things that are likely to happen if you try to carry all five. He told us that it was unlikely that the babies would survive, and that if they did survive, they would most likely have physical and/or mental disabilities.

We were still in a state of shock at this point. Rachelle has a Masters degree in statistics so, in the past, statistics were always on our side. The doctor said that in more than 20 years of doing fertility treatments, he had never had anything like this happen. I guess it was just our luck.

After leaving the fertility clinic, still in a state of shock, we did the only logical thing we could think of — which was, of course, to get a chocolate shake. We were faced with a choice that would seriously affect our lives and the lives of our unborn children. We were told that the best medical option was to reduce to twins so we felt like we had to seriously consider that option.

During this time, both my wife and I felt empty, scared, and abandoned. Why had we been called to make such an awful decision? Why did we feel so little peace? What sort of weird plan were we on where this kind of thing would happen? These and other questions were going through our minds and we sought desperately for peace.

Heavenly Guidance

After we got home, we began to pray in earnest for guidance. Over the next week or so, we met with our bishop who gave us council on the Church's position on abortion and asked for us to pray and fast. Well, he asked for me to fast. Rachelle couldn't fast because of the whole “eating for six” thing.

When we were first considering our options and doing research on everything, we started to think that if we did have to reduce, we would only reduce to triplets because we felt like they would still all have decent odds of getting here safely. We thought it was funny that we considered triplets to be something that would be “easy.”

During this time of decision, several miracles happened. We came in contact with another member of the Church who happened to be friends with Rachelle's cousins and who had quadruplets about three years ago. She told us about a doctor in Phoenix who has a really good track record for delivering quadruplets and quintuplets. His average gestation was several weeks longer than the national average, which was incredible.

Around this time, we went to the temple. Inside the temple, both of us had a very strong feeling that all would work out. We were not sure what that meant but we felt very calm about the whole thing. Also, during the time in the temple, I felt like I had received an answer that we were supposed to keep them all. I didn't want to share this with Rachelle because I knew that she had to come to that same answer on her own or it wouldn't work out.

A little while after our experience in the temple, we met with our stake president. During our meeting with him, we both felt very strongly that we should keep the babies. When we knew that we had both come to the same answer, a huge weight was lifted off our shoulders and we were very excited and very happy. We were going to do all we could to get those babies here safely and although we had no idea how it was all going to turn out, it seemed to give renewed purpose to our lives.

In fact, we still don't know how it is all going to turn out. Rachelle is at 24 weeks right now and is in Phoenix staying with her very gracious Aunt Jeanie and Uncle Rick. So far she and the babies are doing well. We don't know yet what the whole outcome of this will be, but we feel a peaceful, calm assurance that we are doing the right thing.

I would have never guessed that this kind of thing would happen to our family. I really try to do what is right and I know Rachelle does as well. In the beginning we thought that maybe we had done something bad to deserve this. Now, however, we feel like it is precisely because of the good things we have done and who we try to be, that our Heavenly Father has seen fit to give us such a great blessing.

Rachelle in April

We know there will be times of trial and discouragement that will surely come with these babies. That comes with any new baby. We know that we made the right decision when we were faced with a difficult choice. We met change head on and embraced it. We stuck to our principles.