I have to admit, I don’t go to the supermarket and buy groceries very often. But I do try and be a good husband and help my wife. So a few times a month, I go and do the shopping. I feel good deep inside knowing that I am helping her, and I am trying to show my appreciation for all that she does.

However, when I reach the check-out counter to pay the bill, I am always saddened.

I see rows and rows of fashion magazines, of gossip magazines and of “authentic” articles that vie for our attention. They are fancy and colorful and meant to catch our eyes. I also have to admit to something else. Sometimes my wife will take them and turn them backwards. Why? We have teenage children and we don’t want them to see or read them.

These magazines, shouting for our attention, glamorize and sensationalize the wild escapades of celebrities and are illustrated with pictures of young men and women who are barely dressed. So often, they do attract the attention of people — both young and old. If they weren’t popular, the supermarkets wouldn’t waste valuable floor space on them.

In fact, they are not just given any space, but they are the last thing you see as you check out. These businesses know the magazines sell, and sell well. Our youth see and idolize the celebrities as role models.

The message these magazines give out is simple, yet alarming. They show young men and women who have gained fame, fortune and all the world has to offer by simply showing their bodies and living a wild life. What they don’t show are the results of their actions.

The results to society are devastating. Some of the direct results are the rise in pornography, more eating disorders, and the increase in premarital sex and of extramarital affairs. Lives are ruined, bad habits are formed, money is wasted and families are broken. Recently an article in Newsweek magazine (February 12, 2007 USA edition) said a recent study revealed that “…55% of teens who were exposed to a lot of sexual material had intercourse by 16, compared with only 6% of teens who rarely saw sexual imagery in the media.”

Never before, probably in the history of our entire world, has there been such a great need to stand up and show something different. What the world needs to see is the thousands of young men and women who are willing to make a stand and make a difference, who live virtuous lives and dress modestly and hold sacred the values we know to be true.

A Change to Modest-Only

I am in the fashion industry. A few years ago, when I changed my retail outlet from a sweater store to modest-only bridal and formal store called Allyse’s Bridal, manufacturers, suppliers and other retailers laughed and made fun of me and my partners. We were told that modesty would never work, that what people wanted, needed and were buying was exactly the opposite of what we were going to supply. They now think a bit differently. Over the past seven years, we have sold nearly 50,000 modest gowns. Modesty is alive, and the young women are proving it.

I am often asked the question, “Does it really make a difference what I wear?” The answer is YES. Our thoughts and our actions as well as the thoughts and actions of others are influenced by what we do or don’t wear. When we dress inappropriately, we are often tempted to act that way.

Even if we aren’t tempted, what kind of message do we give to our date and to others who see us? This may sound old fashioned to many or it may sound out of touch with reality, but I know that many people and companies spend millions trying to show how beautiful their revealing clothing is and how by wearing it, you are sure to attract the attention of others.

The only problem with their logic is that is exactly the wrong kind of attention we should strive for. Instead, we should hope to catch attention by who we are, and what we stand for, and what we have to offer. We should be telling others by the way we dress that we do care about and respect ourselves.

Several years ago, a popular shoe company ran an advertisement that I loved. It said something like,” Women are too often measured by the way their body curves or doesn’t curve, by where it is large or not so big. They are often measured by numbers and statistics, like 36-24-36. So if a woman is to be measured, let her be measured by the things that do count. By who she is and what she is trying to become; because as every woman knows, statistics are only numbers, and statistics lie.”

The stories of the young women who have and are choosing modesty don’t make the front pages of the popular worldly magazines, but I believe as the angels above are writing the history of the world, their headlines include the efforts of these modern day stripling warriors.

Only 36?

Allison lived in Dallas, Texas. When I first her, she had a bright smile and an incredible determination. She was going to her prom, and she was going to make sure that she dressed appropriately. She knew that she may be one of the only girls in her entire school who would be dressed that way, but she wanted to stand up for what her parents and Church leaders had taught her. She also wanted her classmates and friends to know that they too could look not only as beautiful, but even more so because they would be dressing appropriately.

So, last year she decided to host a fashion show in her area and show off our modest attire. One of the goals of BeautifullyModest.com is to try and host modest fashion shows as many weekends as possible. Usually when we help a girl or woman host a fashion show, we send seven prom dresses (usually the colors of the Young Women’s value colors), as well as some bridal and mother of the bride dresses.

However, Allison was relentlessly determined for me to send more than that to her. She didn’t want just seven prom dresses. She wanted more, and last year I agreed. This year, Allison (who now lives in Provo and works in our store), told me it was time for the fashion show again in Dallas and she was going to host it. I watched as she began arranging the dresses. I was determined to stick with our company’s plan of how many we send, yet no matter how many ways I said no to her, she just continued to pull more and more dresses from inventory, all the while explaining why the answer should be yes.

I asked her how many she wanted and she said, “only 36.” Only 36? Did she know how much that would cost our company? Did she understand that I couldn’t say yes? I went back to my office to run a report for her. I was going to show her how much it cost to do what she wanted. I said a small prayer asking that she would understand.

As I prayed, a scripture came to my mind. So strong was the impression, that I opened my scriptures and read (D. & C. 18:10), “Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God.” I looked again at the cost numbers and walked out to her and told her that I was proud of her and was sure that she would be successful.

This year, the event attracted nearly 150 people to her show. Young women and mothers, who possibly would never get the chance to see so many modest clothes, now had that chance. Would we sell to every person there? No, of course not, but if it helped one, even “just one,” the worth of that soul in doing what is right would be great. Allison is a true modern-day stripling warrior, all because she had been taught well in her youth and because she had the courage to make a difference. Allison, and others just like her who stand up and dress appropriately, are the true examples — not the stars whose faces and actions are plastered for our youth to see.

Notes of Thanks

Every day I receive a lot of emails thanking us for what we are trying to do. Although I love all of them, one especially touched my heart. It was from a young man who wrote (I paraphrase):

I am senior in high school. I have enjoyed my high school years and I look forward each year to going to prom and homecoming. I always have asked girls who come from good families and have been taught as I have. Until this year though, each time I went to pick up my date, she was dressed suggestively, and so I never had pictures taken because I didn’t want my mother to see them.

This year, I was so glad when I went to pick up my date and she was dressed in one of your dresses. She looked more beautiful than any girl I had ever seen, and she was dressed the right way. This year, I took my date home to meet my parents before the dance. I have never been able to do that before. Thanks and know that there are a lot of us guys who feel the same way.

(As a side note, more than 25% of emails that come to me are from young men — and they are thanking us.)

One final note: parents, you too need to take note of what you are wearing, reading and endorsing. These values that we hold true must be taught by word and example at home. Will it make a difference? Maybe it won’t change the world, but it will help you save your children, the most precious gift we each have.

Is it making a difference? A few years ago, people laughed as I told them of my desires to make modesty a fashion statement and to spread it around the world. In the beginning, I thought it was just something that would interest LDS girls. I was so wrong. We see girls of all faiths who have those same values, and they too hold them dear to their hearts. They too are trying to make a difference. It has given me more courage and determination than ever to make modesty the true fashion statement.

Last year, just a few years after beginning, thousands of girls dressed the way they had been taught. They are some of the modern-day stripling warriors making a difference in the world today.