The Family that Plays Together
By C.S. Bezas

Ever heard the twist on an old expression: "The family that plays together, stays together"? Just think about it. It's true, especially from a kid's perspective. When a parent takes the time to chuckle, chat, and play a game with a child, the child notices Mom or Dad values her enough to show her. The following story illustrates this point:

Three hundred twenty-six school children of a district near Indianapolis were asked to write anonymously just what each thought of his father.

The teacher hoped that the reading of the essays might attract the fathers to attend at least one meeting of the Parent-Teachers Association.

It did.

They came in [inexpensive] cars and [luxurious] cars. Bank president, laborer, professional man, clerk, salesman, meter reader, farmer, utility magnate, merchant, baker, tailor, manufacturer, and contractor, every man with a definite estimate of himself in terms of money, skill, and righteousness or looks … 

The president picked at random from [a] stack of papers. “I like my daddy,” she read from each. The reasons were many: he built my doll house, took me coasting, taught me to shoot, helps with my schoolwork, takes me to the park, gave me a pig to fatten and sell. Scores of essays could be reduced to: “I like my daddy. He plays with me.”

Not one child mentioned his family house, car, neighborhood, food, or clothing.

The fathers went into the meeting from many walks of life; they came out in two classes: companions to their children or strangers to their children.

No man is too rich or too poor to play with his children. (Lesson 14: “Having Fun Together as Families,”, Duties and Blessings of the Priesthood: Basic Manual for Priesthood Holders, Part B, 123 ).

It really is that simple. So if it's been a while since you've been able to chuckle, chat, and/or play a game with your kids, it's time for some FHE Fun!

FHE Fun!

Opening Song: #195 Family Night

Opening Prayer: By invitation.

Devotional: Make sure everyone in the family has at least one opportunity a month to share a favorite scripture during Family Home Evening. By taking turns, it not only will build the individual, but it will help bring a sweet spirit into the home for each FHE!

Activity:

Items Needed:

• Popsicle sticks (one per family member)
• Pens (to write on the popsicle sticks)

Read the following thought to your family:

What is the purpose of FHE? President Boyd K. Packer gave the answer: "to draw families together in love, to open the doors of communication between parents and children, to make them happy they live together and belong to one another — eternally" (Lucile C. Tate, Boyd K. Packer, A Watchman on the Tower [1995], 166).

Ask everyone in the family to think about one activity that is fun and that they feel would bring the family "together in love." Have them write that activity on their Popsicle sticks. Once they are finished, collect the Popsicle sticks and read each one out loud. Make sure to encourage each individual as their idea is read — there are no "bad" ideas, because each one is a dream and an expression of the person who gave it.

Brainstorm about how to incorporate the "popsicle ideas" into future FHEs. Finish up with the following activity:

1. Pull a chair to the center of the room. This becomes the Family Hub Chair. Invite the youngest child to come sit on the chair (Mom or Dad may need to hold children that are too young to sit by themselves).
2. Invite each person in the family to share the following phrase, "(Name)_________, I love you (or value you) because you _____________________."
3. Go around the family circle two times before switching the person in the Family Hub Chair, so that the person in the chair will have heard many positive comments.
4. Invite the next child to sit in the chair. Invite each family member to share the following phrase for that person: "(Name)___________, I love you because you__________________." Again, go around the family circle two times before moving on to the next person (make sure to include yourself and all family members, regardless of age).

Remind the family that the family unit is sacred in the Lord's eyes. Every effort to build and strengthen family bonds will be rewarded in the eternities, including those efforts to play with and enjoy one another's company.

Closing Song: #194 The Family

Closing Prayer: By invitation.

Refreshments: Here is a tasty Mango Yogurt Popsicle Treat. Not only is it yummy and healthy, but it's a two-part process to prep it. Why not have the kids help you quickly create this the night before FHE. As a family you can chat about how each stage of preparation for the dessert is like building a strong family — it's a multi-step process, but oh so yummy when done!

Struggling with your teens? C.S. Bezas' book has been described as an essential aid for youth leaders and parents. Powerful Tips for Powerful Teachers: Helping Youth Find Their Spiritual Wings is available in LDS bookstores and by clicking here. 

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C.S. Bezas graduated from BYU in communications, with an emphasis in human resource development and training programs. She also took seminary teacher-training classes while studying at BYU, looking forward to the day when she might join the ranks of the Lord’s seminary teachers. She now teaches early-morning seminary in the southeastern portion of the United States. Additionally, she has conducted trainings and workshops for audiences on a variety of topics and has won recognition for her writings and stage musicals.

C.S. Bezas has appeared as a keynote speaker and before audiences on television, stage, and film. Her book Powerful Tips for Powerful Teachers has been called essential for those who work with teens and for parents. She is the creator of a soothing-music CD series found at CSBezasMusic.com. She and her husband have four children and relish the gospel of Jesus Christ.