We recently received a letter from a distressed mom who doesn’t know what to do about the conflict of sports and church on Sundays.  This is another can-o’-worms topic, because although the subject may seem like a no-brainer for many of us, those who have children on the front lines can be put in a bad position. 

Does a parent risk alienating a child by forbidding sports on Sunday?  Are children being over-programmed?  Is this a case of good-better-best?  How can parents teach their children when there is so much pressure?

Here’s what our reader has to say.  Read her words and tell us what you think:

The topic of Sabbath and soccer came up as many of the moms I associate with have children on multiple teams in our city.  They struggle with "holding a child back" who has talent and ambition.   They feel their child will rebel and hate the Church for ruining their chances in whatever sport, if they can't play Sunday games.

I just listened and didn't offer my point of view since it seems so extreme.  My children are in soccer but my oldest is seven and hasn't run into a problem with Sunday observance yet.

I remember many lessons in Young Women however, using an example of a girl who didn't play in a championship game on Sunday because it was wrong and gained a testimony of the Sabbath through that sacrifice.  I wasn't allowed to play any sport on Sunday or Monday night when I was growing up.

I wonder if we as parents are placing too much importance on sports in our own lives and therefore teaching our children to value sports too much.  Most children will not grow up to be professional athletes.   The moral environment at the professional level is not a healthy one anyway.  So, why are we pushing sports so much?

I have friends who have their children in two or three sports at a time.   My seven-year-old has soccer three days a week and she is competing with girls who have been training since they were three.  I don't think all these three-year-old children are begging their parents to start soccer.  I don't know that they would always choose it over other healthy things.

I was out to dinner with some friends a week ago and one of the mothers said her son didn't play with another child in our ward who is at the same school and in the same grade because he "isn't the athletic type."  That sums it up, I think.  We as parents want our kids to have everything.  We want them to have friends, be popular and we want our friends to think we are cool too.

Soccer Mom

Thanks for writing, Soccer Mom.   As someone who has seen three families go inactive (note that I do not say “less active”) because of soccer, I am fully aware that there is a potential problem here.  But because I work in Young Women, I am also aware of the resentment that can build when young people feel forced to attend church rather than participate in activities they want to do on Sundays.

Parents, what is the solution?  How do you keep the Sabbath without alienating your children? 

If you have any advice, please send it to MeridianMagazine@aol.com.   Put something in the subject line to let me know your letter isn’t spam.  We’ll start running your responses next week.

Until next time — Kathy  

“Sports do not build character.  They reveal it.”

John Wooden