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by
Joni Hilton
Preparing
young men to serve missions, now that “the bar has been raised,”
elicited a barrelful of applause, frustration, hurt, and some solid
ideas for boys who don’t “make the cut.” But let’s start with this
letter from Annette Jalayer of Houston Texas, who gives us all food
for thought:
I just love this Circle of Sisters--I see myself so many times written
about over and over and how silly my thoughts were over some now
insignificant incident. It so helps to get perspective by reading
about others, both their ability and inability to work through some
problem. I am an older, single convert to this very-family oriented
church and I see these things happening but some wise older sister
early on told me to remember two things: (1) That my relationship
in this church is first with God who is perfect and then with the
members, who are all imperfect the same as me! (2) We are not expected
to be perfect, only to make our best effort every day to try to
attain perfection. Some days we can give 90% and other days, because
of trials and tribulations it's only 30% but if it's your best effort,
Heavenly Father will fill in the rest. Perhaps those around you
on a very bad day are at 30% or even 10%. That person needs a prayer
and you know it so you should do it---just think where that will
move you on the percentile ladder!
Annette
Jalayer
Houston,
Texas
What a concept: Love your enemies.
Where have I heard that before? Thanks for the good reminder. We
would all be happier if we thought, “How can I lift this person’s
life?” with everyone we meet.
Now on to your letters about worthiness
in serving missions:
Boy,
have I been waiting for someplace to vent and ask questions -- so
here I go. My son (17) will not be serving a Mission -- we found
out abruptly (and not very subtly) at a session about the Raising
of the Bar. His medication disallows it. MY HOPE AND PRAYER is that
we as a Church can soon grow into a habit of using "Fit for
His Service" as the encouraging 'carrot' before our
lads' psyches and souls from when they are toddlers and upwards
(instead of only "when you serve your mission"). ALL boys
are ALWAYS prodded to be worthy and ready to Serve a Mission;
that's great-- until that goal is suddenly dissolved in front of
them for, in some cases, medical reasons. My lad is worthy -- Lord
knows it, he knows it -- but can you guess how many years it'll
take for the stigma of "oh ... Not going on a mission,
eh?" or "hmmm; didn't serve a mission, huh??" to
make way for a more enlightened Ward/Church view? I applaud your
image of us Ward folk "raising the bar" on our OWN responses.
While, our son's older brother is now successfully done with his
Mission -- [all the world loves the successful and returned missionary]
-- need our 17 yr-old have to face a life of ward-wide stigmas beyond
his own inevitable comparisons with this, his beloved and only sibling?
I dearly hope not.
I
feel strongly that the Church Mission Dept. will need come up with
creative and alternate, real ways young men can serve missions,
if not the standard 2-year proselyting kind he is now barred from.
(Yes, we are as a family helping him to learn to serve humanity
in normal daily life; have done so since he was little and will
continue to do so ... but you know what I mean... "Missions".)
I've had well-meaning folk bluntly say "Well, the Church has
mentally retarded individuals serving periods of time in..."
(various routine or menial tasks in Church establishments). Our
son is of standard intelligence, not mentally handicapped; what
can we help him look forward to "doing" for his 'Mission'
Work? Any Church resources I should know about? Help!
Marsha
Paulsen Peters
Iowa City,
Iowa
There are dozens of ways for a young
man like your son to serve the Lord. Your bishop should be able
to steer you in several directions. And goodness knows we need more
boys like yours! Here are a few suggestions from another reader:
My
husband who is currently a Bishop has also been concerned about
this matter as we have several young men in our ward on medication
that probably won't serve missions at 19. Their parents are already
worried about how to handle this, especially since one is an only
child and the others have brothers who will probably serve missions.
As my husband and I discussed this, we realized that their are other
types of missions in this church. We would like to see each Stake
come up with service missions where young men can serve in their
stake area each day but live at home. We have an excellent welfare
farm in our stake and the manager (a very spiritual priesthood holder)
would love to have young men serve missions working with him. He
would be glad to have scripture study with them before work and
then spend the day teaching them about serving in the Lords Vineyard.
These young men could be used to help in Bishops’ Storehouses, at
Family History Centers or even going on "splits" with
the full time Elders in the area. These "Home" Missionaries
could even be rotated around just like full time Elders are moved
to different areas. The important thing is that they would still
be able to say they served a mission. As a Young Women's Counselor,
I often hear the young women say they want to marry a returned missionary.
This message is given to them from the time they are little as parents
think (sometimes mistakenly) that all return missionaries are spiritual
giants and would make the best husbands. My heart goes out to the
young men and their families who aren't allowed to serve missions.
Maybe we just need to find other ways for them to sacrifice their
time and talents serving the Lord.
Karen
Davis
California
Good ideas-- I hope our leaders are
listening. Anyone else out there whose ward or stake has a great
program for “worthy but unable” young men? Keep reading for further
ideas below.
This mom is glad the requirements are
getting tougher:
Our
oldest son is currently serving a mission in Toulouse, France. He
didn't leave to serve his mission right after he turned 19, in fact,
he turns 20 next Thursday, and he will only have been out around
five months. Why? Our bishop at that time was very hard-nosed with
our son (at times I felt he was too hard on our son), but truth
be told, our son had some morality issues he had to clear up, and
he chose to be very honest with the bishop. There were times when
we became very impatient with the whole situation, especially when
we saw boys who we knew had been involved in much more questionable
activities receive callings and even (in one situation) be allowed
to turn in mission papers shortly after our son did. So what was
the result? Our son went out, no regrets, no looking back. Two of
the other boys who weren't held up to the same standard have already
returned from their missions (one after four months, the other after
2 days). It is my opinion that my son is and will be a better missionary
for having had to wait the extra time.
No doubt your son will be a far better
missionary for his honesty-- no nagging guilt, no mixed feelings,
more maturity, fewer distractions-- and best of all, the crucial
companionship of the Holy Ghost. And good for you, supporting your
bishop’s obviously inspired choice.
Now here’s a first-hand account of
why stricter standards are needed:
I
would like to chime in my support for the higher standards for prospective
missionaries. As a returned missionary myself I cannot express how
important this issue is for me. I served in South America and loved
my mission with everything I had. I considered it such a privilege
to serve and tried not to waste a single day.
If
people could only understand how much damage is done when an unprepared,
unworthy, immature missionary gets sent out. I believe the social
pressure that exists to make it embarrassing for anyone to not go
on a mission, would evaporate in a second! Boys and girls spend
hours counseling with the mission president, ( taking up his valuable
time), trying to work out their problems. Rules are broken that
ruin the confidence the members need to have in the missionaries.
They stop giving references because they won't trust their friends
to misbehaving elders and sisters.
There
are some cultures that are already suspicious of the American government.
When American missionaries set bad examples, the church becomes
suspect by association. Not to mention the appalling lack of work
that gets done because the missionaries are out shopping, getting
their nails done, going to the gym, sleeping, going sight seeing,
calling friends and family, going out on dates, going swimming,
playing cards, watching movies, you name it.
I
think that in order to turn things around we need to be more vocal
about the higher expectations. Certainly while involved in the youth
organizations we try to bring it up as much as possible.
I
believe that if we all pray individually for inspiration on how
to encourage and support missionary work, the ideas will come. Every
ward has different needs and one size does not fit all. I think
that every person has different skills and talents and encouraging
the youth to excel in their different areas will bring a much richer
experience to the mission field.
In
a mission, you learn to work as a team and utilize everyone's different
strengths to inspire and help others. Talking about everyone's unique
abilities and pointing out how useful they will be in the mission
field will create new ideas and confidence for our youth.
,,,,
I am constantly on my knees praying to learn how I can foster a
strong understanding of the gospel, a strong testimony and a strong
work ethic.
Which
brings me to my last point. Molly-coddling! Kids must learn how
to work and pull their own weight. It takes an enormous amount of
work to teach children how to work! Do not give in to the dark side
and save it until later! You cannot neglect to teach a child responsibility,
industry and hard work and then expect it to magically appear just
because they were set apart!
Let's
get going everyone! We can do it!
Danna
Skoy
Highland,
CA
Another reader reminds us
of how many reasons there can be for not serving a traditional mission,
and how wrong we are to make rash assumptions:
First
of all, I would like to underscore that it is flat wrong to assume
that young man who does not depart for the MTC shortly after his
19th birthday has sinned and isn't going because he's unprepared
and/or unworthy. I would also like to point out that missionary
service is ultimately a matter between the young man and his Savior.
A young man should not submit mission papers simply because it's
expected or to make his parents proud or to make his mark in the
ward or to score an open house at his home where he's the center
of everyone's attention for an evening. No, he should go because
he is willing and prepared to serve his Savior and his fellow man
in the ways required of full-time missionaries. If he's not prepared
or able to serve a full-time mission, he may find he is still suited
to serve in other ways which are also important to the Lord's work.
Young
men do not all develop at the same rate and many will not have attained
to sufficient maturity by age 19 to serve a full-time mission. Perhaps
fervent prayer could be tried to accelerate the schedule, but the
response depends on the youth's faith, other factors, and what the
Lord has in mind for him. These worthy but less-mature and perhaps
less-prepared young men are those that could nevertheless at some
time be called to serve as ward missionaries. Others enlist in military
service and often open the way for the full-time missionaries amongst
their fellow soldiers and in the countries where they are stationed.
These young men may well have developing and perhaps deep but quiet
testimonies. Just as personally attending temple sessions is not
the only way to participate in temple work, serving a full-time
mission is not the only way to perform missionary service. Whom
the Lord calls, the Lord qualifies, but remember that the Lord extends
the call, and it may be that the Lord sees that youth's talents,
skills, and capabilities as fitting a different kind of mission...
My
son ties his tie correctly and helps others tie theirs. He enjoys
listening to the testimonies of others. Otherwise bright and mechanically
gifted, he doesn't like to read, has always struggled with reading
and writing, and feels very uncomfortable reading in front of others.
He spent several years in special education and was even home schooled
to give him at least some reading and writing skills. He's a good
kid but doesn't fit the full-time missionary mold, at least not
the stereotype he's observed over the years. And he has had problems
all his life with his feet--too severe to qualify for his nation's
army, and perhaps too severe to serve full-time tracting and walking
door-to-door in the Army of the Lord.
A
person who does not depart for a full-time mission at the traditional
time may indeed have a worthiness problem, but it would be wrong
to conclude that the person is therefore unworthy. Unworthiness
would not immediately be assumed of a young couple with small children
who don't attend the temple regularly--yet. Nor would it be made
of seniors who do not receive their mission call soon after the
retirement party. It certainly would not be made of people like
our bishop, who retired a few years ago but has not departed for
a full-time senior mission and probably (and understandably) never
will because they have a handicapped son who requires round the
clock institutional care. We do not always see the personal challenges,
handicaps, and obstacles that may or may not be surmountable sufficient
for full-time service. We do not know what the Lord requires of
his individual son or daughter, because it's a matter that rests
between the Lord, His child, and the bishop. I do know that the
Lord is fully aware of that person's individual abilities and needs,
and together they can find some way for that person to serve meaningfully...
Cindy
Espinoza
Grand Junction,
CO
What about those who don’t qualify
due to their own actions, or those who come home early? And what
of the advice we give our young women, to marry a returned missionary?
I like this reader’s view:
We
have seen devastated young men who don't qualify for missionary
service, or who are sent home early from the field. It is horribly
hard on them and their families. I agree that it takes genuine love
and concern and outreaching of those around these young men to help
them to overcome this setback in life.
Unfortunately,
we often hear comments such as "No woman worth marrying would
want a young man who didn't serve a mission." I'm sure that
these young men, trying to overcome these setbacks, hear these comments
and this has to affect their self esteem. I think that most parents
of daughters desire that their daughters marry worthy priesthood
holders who can bring them to the celestial kingdom. A young man
whose behavior does not qualify him to serve, or worse yet, is sent
home early while serving, due to worthiness issues, is usually not
considered a desirable marriage candidate by many LDS families.
Oh,
if young men could only see beyond the moment and realize that very
soon they are going to face the bishop and Stake president and have
to answer some very detailed personal questions regarding moral
worthiness before they can progress on to being considered for a
mission call. However, if the Lord can forgive and remember no more
the sins of the truly repentant, then we should do the same. There
are cases where these young men, who formerly dealt with worthiness
issues, have turned their lives around and forsaken their former
ways and have become honorable priesthood holders. In these cases,
I would say that these young men can be every bit as "worthy"
temple marriage partners as their returned missionary counterparts.
(And there are certainly many missionaries who have filled their
two year assignments and come home and later choose less than honorable
paths or behaviors.) However, one still has to deal with natural
consequences of one's choices, even if we have been forgiven of
the behavior that led to that consequence...
For
those young men with moral worthiness issues who are trying to repent
and repair their lives and for those young men whose health issues
have affected missionary service, it is imperative that they are
totally surrounded with love and support. It is more difficult in
the case of the somewhat unrepentant, as it is very tough to help
those who don't really want to be helped, although they also need
love and support.
You’re so right-- Heavenly Father wants
all his children to come home, and we cannot turn our backs on any
of them. Also, young women need to be reminded that finding a RM
to marry is no guarantee of a celestial marriage-- the only guarantee
is a confirming witness from the Holy Ghost, and follow-through
by our own actions to make the marriage succeed.
Some of your letters expressed years
of pain:
I
came into the Church at almost 22, spiritually immature, and locked
into a tuition-paid education program that I would have lost if
I had left to serve a mission. I still, 43 years later, recall the
occasional hurtful suggestions that I might have been just not up
to it, or unworthy because of imagined sexual immoral activities
prior to joining the Church, and that I would not be worthy of a
"nice girl" as a marriage partner because I was not a
returned missionary. It tempted me to seek associations outside
the Church for a few years. I still remember young women's' leaders
advising girls to get themselves a returned missionary, barely stopping
short of saying "and never mind the other riff raff".
I don't know how to shield
those who do not serve missions from the sometimes cruel speculations
of other members. I proceeded with my life in a way that enabled
me to take pride in myself and not depend on the opinions of others.
I
am 68 years old and will be going on a mission with my wife within
the next year or two. We are currently taking care of my mother-in-law
who is 89 years and in poor health.
When
I was of age to go on a mission as a young elder, I was not permitted
because there was a restriction, by the draft board, on the number
able to go from a ward. There were less than 50% of those my age
that could get out on missions. I lived through that disappointment.
The one annoying thing that followed those of us that fell into
that category was a question on the part of leaders as to that being
the real reason. Also, many times over the years stake leaders would
ask, in stake priesthood meetings, for all those that were returned
missionaries to stand. I felt uncomfortable in my younger years
because I couldn't stand and felt like a second class citizen.
Additionally, I have had stake leaders, when called in for a stake
calling, ask where I went on a mission. If I tried to explain the
reason, they seemed to stop listening, so I finally would just say,
"they wouldn't let me."
I could say more, but let it suffice - leaders need to rethink their
motives, lack of forethought when it comes to putting those that
didn't fit the mold of being permitted/able to jump through all
the right hoops.
I have remained active all my life, but have felt the "no mission"
as a dark cloud hanging over the heads of those of us not permitted
to go.
That's my brief input on the topic.
Brother
Croft
Many men shared similar stories. How
sad that someone actually had “all the returned missionaries stand.”
There is already enough regret without being singled out in public.
I know many church leaders (bishops, stake presidents) who didn’t
serve for a variety of reasons, such as yours. How shameful to judge
them. And, even if it had been for morality reasons, it’s who they
are today that matters. People who don’t believe in repentance,
don’t understand the Atonement.
This sister endured similar rejection:
I
went on a mission to Ireland many years ago. I had the support of
a loving ward and thought life was wonderful. When I got over to
Ireland, I got so ill that I ended up being sent home 3 weeks later.
It was ultimately my decision and one of the hardest in my life.
When I needed the loving support of my ward family (I was only a
convert of 2 years), I was met with rumors, accusations, and members
asking for money back they'd given me to get on my mission. I spent
years floundering between activity and inactivity in the church.
Though doctors said I'd made the right decision, the words of my
ward family rang in my ears and I thought I was a loser and failure.
I've often wondered if those members ever knew how their words affected
me and my self esteem and testimony in the church. It wasn't until
years later that a loving bishop explained to me I had done what
I needed to and the Lord knew that. He also talked about those members
and the condemnation they would fall under.
I
mention this because whether the young man or woman goes out, returns
early, or never has the opportunity to serve because of the new
rules, the same love and support needs to be applied to all. Love
them simply as they are. Realize the struggle and heartache they
are feeling. Put yourself in their shoes. And love them in spite
of the problems and struggles they are in. Help them to find the
gospel as they will flounder and doubt themselves. And hold on to
them. If you don't, you're going to miss out on a wonderful you
man or woman who can add many good things to your ward family.
Kristi
Ellen Lemus
Sacramento,
California
Thanks, Kristi. If only people would
implement charity, and really live the gospel!
Here are some suggestions about preparation,
and other ways to serve:
I
don't typically respond to articles via discussion boards. Your
topic, however, lit me up. I have been a Young Men's president three
times, been in a stake Young Men's presidency, taught our ward's
missionary preparation course, and currently work with the single
young adults in our ward. I served a mission when I was a young
man, and my oldest son just returned from a mission. My second son
may not go on a mission. I feel very strongly about your topic and
(like everyone) have some strong opinions.
It
is clear to anyone that has served in the mission field that not
all young men are adequately prepared to serve the Lord when they
first arrive. Unfortunately, there are young men (and young women)
that never catch the vision of the work and are not able to be productive
missionaries. Worse, there are full-time missionaries that actually
drag the work down. I think that has been a problem for a long time--witness
Alma and his son Corianton...
I
think it is more than a coincidence that the revised Duty to God
program was introduced prior to Elder Ballard's talk. I believe
this program, when it is used by parents, can have a significant
impact on our young men. I believe it can help our young men by
strengthening their testimonies and building some of the practical
skills so necessary for a mission (e.g., service orientation, appropriate
social interactions, hygiene, etc.) What surprises me is the perspective
that some have toward that program--I have fielded phone calls from
parents that complain that their young man hasn't received his certificate
(for deacon, teacher, priest) and they fault the young men's presidency.
Worse,
I have spoken with parents and priesthood leaders that have no idea
that a book of requirements exists for each quorum. Yet, they wring
their hands about their concerns relative to preparing young men
for missions (helping them meet the "new bar"). It strikes
me that this is another situation like the brazen serpent--we are
concerned about preparing our young men, but aren't using the inspired
program that the Lord has made available to us. I don't mean to
be overly harsh, but anyone that has even looked at the program
in depth understands the blessing that it can be to parents (particularly)
in working with their sons.
Regardless
of our best efforts, there are young men that will exercise their
agency and not be prepared to serve a traditional full-time mission.
I think this will always be one of the most painful experiences
for a parent--we can do our best, but a young man (or young woman)
will ultimately have to consecrate themselves to the work. I don't
think our ward is dissimilar to most wards in the Church--we are
VERY good at providing a lock-step program for our young men. We
expect that they will participate in the Young Men's program through
their 18th birthday. At that point, we focus on mission preparation
or expect them to go to school (often a Church sponsored school).
We expect them to get out to the mission field close to their 19th
birthday and return and get married close to their 21st birthday.
When we have an exception, we are sometimes at a loss. When a young
man does not fit in the lock-step program, they tend to shy away
from the Church-they feel they don't fit--that everyone in the ward
is looking down on them as "weak", physically, emotionally,
and (certainly) spiritually.
In
our stake, we have a crisis among our young adults--that group has
the greatest per capita inactivity rate of any age group. Could
it be that part of that is driven by their perception that we don't
have a place for them in the Church?
I
think that we have to look for non-traditional opportunities for
our young men that aren't able to go on missions--that don't "fit
the mold". President Hinckley talked about what a new convert
to the Church needs to be successful--it seems like that age group
requires the same thing: 1) Need to be nurtured in the word (would
some options be really focused home teachers, a young adult gospel
doctrine class, a push to have that group attending institute?),
2) Need to have a responsibility in the ward (can they be called
as primary teachers, scout leaders, greeters, etc.?), 3) A friend
(someone that they can look to as a mentor--not necessarily a priesthood
leader, but someone that can build a positive relationship with
them and be an example: possibly a home teaching companion that
understands the double duty of ministering to the families and ministering
to his companion). The young men in that age group should receive
the special focus of the ward correlation committee, the priesthood
executive committee, and the single adult committee in the ward.
Depending
upon the stake and the mission, I believe there is room in the Church
to provide unique opportunities for missionary service. In our mission,
the mission president, a good bishop, and the stake presidency worked
together to provide a young man with an opportunity to serve the
mission in a non-traditional role. This young man was called to
be a "service" missionary where he provides office and
administrative support for the mission. He is expected to live by
the mission rules--he dresses like a missionary, wears a tag, and
supports the mission by working in the mission office six days a
week. In this young man's case, he does not proselyte, but provides
an invaluable service to the mission.
I
think about all of the things that have to happen to make a mission
work--all of the administration that takes full-time elders away
from proselyting. Clearly, some young men would not be able to serve
in that capacity, based upon the challenges that they are working
on. But think about the opportunities that could be generated if
we had a good dialog between a mission president and the stake presidency
to provide non-traditional opportunities for young men that don't
fit the mold. I don't think the Lord takes offense when we use our
creativity to provide opportunities for service and growth--on the
contrary, I think he will hold us accountable if we don't make a
profound effort to provide options.
Well said. Another reader asked for
a clarification of what these new standards are, but maybe we all
just need to study the quorum requirement books.
Wow
this article hit home with me. We have a 20 yr old son who decided
a mission wasn't for him. He didn't have the desire to serve. Disappointment,
grief and embarrassment was my first reaction. After all, we had
planned for him to serve from the day he was born. When people ask
about him I am embarrassed to say, no he has chosen not to serve
a mission. Then I have to deal with their reaction. I have learned
they can judge and think poorly of us but we honestly did the best
job we could with the knowledge we had when raising him. Although
I have to remind myself of this often when the feelings I have failed
as a mother arise.
I
have learned a great deal from this experience and am still learning.
I have learned never to judge others. Especially never judge the
parents by their children's actions. I would not want to be judged
by what my son does or doesn't do and I will not judge others. I
have learned to love him even though he didn't choose to do what
we hoped he would.
I
am learning to still love myself even though my son doesn't fit
the mold. I am learning to ignore the stares or snickers when I
walk by. What I have learned most of all is to rely on the Lord
for comfort, guidance and hope that some day my son will return
to the fold, marry in the temple, raise a good family and follow
Christ with all his heart.
I
think the best way we can help these young men is to still support
and love them. Encourage them to succeed in other ways and remember
who's sons they really are an know He loves them too.
Don’t forget that it was the pinheads
in the great and spacious building who were staring and snickering.
You just hold on tight to the rod, Girlfriend. And remember, every
child has free agency-- you can do everything possible and some
will still choose to follow a different path. It’s equally perplexing
when kids from dreadful families nevertheless get baptized and serve
valiantly. Don’t overanalyze this, or you’ll go crazy!
Several readers responded with ideas
for preparing our children to serve missions. Dave Whiteley of Concord,
North Carolina, wrote:
...
Personal worthiness is the beginning step in encouragement because
many of the young men described are not worthy to serve and need
to first correct the things that keep them from feeling the full
influence of the Spirit, that's what will change their hearts and
their lives. In my conversations with my son I take that he doesn't
want to serve as a given; he's 19 after all and should be treated
like an adult and his opinion should be respected. So I asked the
question, "OK, you don't want to serve a mission, are you ready
to attend the Temple? The standards for entry are the same, are
you doing the things that allow attendance or are you doing things
that prohibit attendance?"
Living the Gospel is a life long endeavor and
many of our young people are not accustomed to seeing the big picture,
what with the world telling them to live for the moment. These young
men, and some of our young women, need the same things that our
newest converts need; that is a friend, a calling, and the nurturing
word of Christ. In the end don't we all need these things too.
....
the last thing any of these brothers or sisters need is to feel
ostracized or abandoned because right now they don't measure up
to "our" standards. Maybe the challenge from the Lord
is to us to find a way to love them more and serve them in such
a way (led by the Spirit) that we can rejoice when they and we are
all fully engaged in the service of our God. What a glorious day
that will be for them and for us who have had a part in everyday
miracles.
Dave
Whiteley
Concord,
NC
Another parent writes:
How
do we prepare them? I personally believe it is the responsibility
of a loving home to teach and inspire the missionary. Then the task
is supplemented by seminary and church leaders. The seminary program,
in my opinion, is lacking in its emphasis to teach and prepare missionaries
and perhaps the Church education system can improve on this. It
is not enough to just read the Book of Mormon. These young people
need a testimony of it... They need to be able to discuss it and
apply it.. I found for my current missionary that going to mission
prep classes at our local institute was very helpful as well as
he changed how he led his daily life. He stopped listening to popular
music. He stopped going to movies and he stopped watching a lot
of TV in his spare time. Teaching our children self discipline will
be helpful. Teach them how to get along with others (companions
). I love missionaries. May we grow as mothers to prepare them.
Last, we heard from folks who reminded
us of the role our young women play, in encouraging boys to serve
the Lord. Their trendy, immodest clothing and aggressive behavior
towards boys was seen as a definite detriment to keeping our sons
worthy to serve. What are your views about that? Does anyone have
a great program or activity that helped instill modest values in
their young women? I look forward to hearing from you.
Joni
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