Whom the Lord Loveth, He Chasteneth
By Susan Law Corpany

He Didn’t Get It

I had to punish my dog today. He got out of his dog run and went for a lengthy jaunt through the neighborhood before returning home and following the trail of roast beef that I had laid out to lead him carefully back into his kennel.

This isn’t the first time he has escaped, and my husband suggested giving him a spray from the hose upon his return, as close as possible to his misdeed so that he would make an association between his escape and his punishment.

We, of course, realize that luring him back into the kennel with dog treats and lunch meat rewards him for his misbehavior, so after he followed the trail of roast beef to the bowl of leftover chili, I hooked the leash on him, took him back out, scolded him and administered the punishment. I don’t think he got it.

The puzzled look he gave me reminded me of the time I spanked my three-year-old son for running into the street without looking and nearly getting hit by a car. After the spanking, he turned a tear-streaked face to me and asked, “Why would you spank a kid for not getting hit by a car?”

We Don’t Get It

I would like to say that as we mature, or at least age, we get better at accepting correction, but I’m not sure that’s the case with most of us. If anything, we may feel that as adults we have outgrown the need for correction.

As a writer, I have learned to quiet my ego down and learn from the observations of others, particularly those who know the craft of writing far better than I do. A recent suggestion had me revisiting a chapter to give a weary bishop a bit more joy in the journey. My first impulse upon hearing the suggestion, though, was to defend my position. However, upon reflection, I realized that she was probably right, and that although I wanted to show the challenges of a bishop’s calling, I did not want him slogging through his service devoid of enjoyment in his ministry to his ward members.

I changed the line where he compares his calling to a roller coaster ride, saying how he doesn’t like roller coasters to him saying a roller coaster ride is “both exhilarating and terrifying.”

I have learned with my writing that following the suggestions of those I have learned to trust usually results in a better finished product. I imagine that’s what God is trying to do with us.

Are You Mr. Right?

Recently my husband and I went out for lunch. When our order was ready, I only had one of the mini pitas, and I had ordered two.

Me: “Where is my other sandwich?”

Fast food employee: “You only ordered one.”

Me: “I changed my order, but apparently you didn’t hear me. I asked for two. I didn’t realize they were so small.”

At this point, my expectation was that he would understand that I wanted another one and apologize about the mix-up, even if it was partially my fault, and offer to make it for me. I had acknowledged that I had not spoken up and made sure he heard me, but he seemed intent on making it clear that it was not his fault that my order was wrong.

Fast food employee: “But you only ordered one.”

Me: “If you say so. Okay, then I would like to order another one.”

In other more important arenas, scenarios like this are played out all the time. Three of the hardest words for us to learn to say: “I was wrong.”

Think of the last time you were given a suggestion or correction. Remember your response. Now consider these scriptures.

• Reprove not a scorner, lest he hate thee: rebuke a wise man, and he will be yet wiser: teach a just man, and he will increase in learning. (Proverbs 9:8-9)

• The way of a fool is right in his own eyes: but he that harkeneth unto counsel is wise. (Proverbs 12:15)

• All the ways of a man are clean in his own eyes; but the Lord weigheth the spirits. (Proverbs 16:2)

Good Advice

In my life, there have been many instances of advice I wish I had heeded. Here are my suggestions.

• Understand that you might not always be right.

• Acknowledging your weaknesses is actually a position of strength.

• Learn from people who are older and wiser and have more experience than you do.

• Be willing to learn from people who may have more specialized knowledge than you do, even if they are younger.

• Be willing to admit when you have made a mistake.

• Be wise enough to follow good advice.

And now I am going to sign off, because it says in Proverbs 17:28:

Even a fool, when he holdeth his peace is counted wise; and he that shutteth his lips is esteemed a man of understanding.

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Susan Law Corpany grew up in Salt Lake City. She attended Utah State University and the University of Utah, and she is currently attending the University of Hawaii at Hilo, on the big island of Hawaii, where she now lives. She is married to Thom Curtis, a sociology professor at UHH. She has one son, a stepdaughter and five stepsons. She recently became a grandmother to the world's most beautiful baby girl and will, on request, furnish the e-mail addresses of her unmarried returned missionary sons to eligible young ladies in an attempt to get more such wonderful grandbabies.

She has stored up a half century of wit and wisdom and began a couple of decades ago to download it onto the printed page. Widowed in her twenties, a series of books resulted from the experience. She is the author of Brotherly Love, Unfinished Business, Push On and Are We There Yet? She considers herself sort of a cross between Erma Bombeck and Eliza R. Snow and says she writes under her first married name "To honor my first husband and not to embarrass my current one." She is currently working on several other novels, and is collaborating on a humorous self-help book called, "Why Don't the Airlines Ever Lose My Emotional Baggage?"

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