On a trip to the east coast a couple of years ago, due to differing flight schedules, I had a free day in Atlanta with a car and no husband. I decided to do something my husband would not have found enjoyable, so I drove to Jonesboro, outside of Atlanta, and visited the Road to Tara Museum. I then took a tour of the city which ended with a visit to an antebellum mansion that locals say was the inspiration for the fictional Tara of Gone With the Wind.

A few years before that, on another "found" day in Atlanta, I had taken the opportunity to tour the Margaret Mitchell house, where she wrote the famous novel. As I toured the home and heard the stories, I found myself relating to Ms. Mitchell's writing style. She wrote the end of the book first. She did not write consecutively. She borrowed from real life, and many of her characters were based on people she knew. Her goal in writing Gone With the Wind was to create a female character who had "gumption." Likewise, I decided that the character of Beverly I had created has "gumption." I continued to relate to many things they said about her, except, of course, the part where her book became an all-time best-seller and the movie event many believe will never be surpassed. (However, we are both brunettes.)

According to the tour guide, she had an ex-husband everyone called "Red" because of his hair, who was somewhat of a scoundrel, likely a model for Rhett Butler. Many believe she modeled Scarlett after herself. Although married, she enjoyed shocking her neighbors by placing her maiden name--her pen name--and her husband's name on their mailbox, leading their neighbors to shun them because they believed they were scandalously living in sin. Fiddledeedee!

As I toured the museum gift shop on my most recent visit, I noticed a stack of t-shirts that said, "I'm a Melanie." They were white with the letters in a soft shade of baby blue. "We can't keep the red 'I'm a Scarlett' shirts in stock," the sales lady told me. "Everyone fancies themselves a Scarlett. Nobody wants to be a Melanie." Like the choice between "Ginger and Mary Ann," nobody wants to be the sweet farmer's daughter when they could be the glamorous movie star.

I remembered back to my tour of Margaret Mitchell's home and how I had related to so many of the tales of this author upon whom Scarlett was loosely based and realized with some embarrassment, that I, too, probably considered myself a "Scarlett"--a survivor. I doubt I would have bought the shirt however, even if they'd been in stock, so instead I decided that with a couple of long airplane flights still ahead of me, a copy of the novel would be a good purchase.

In reading it through another time, though, I found myself paying more attention to the downside of Scarlett, because of what the clerk had said about the t-shirts. I think the part of Scarlett that people identify with is the "gumption," the ability to survive. However, Scarlett is also an opportunist, self-centered, vain, spoiled, and Rhett had it right when he said, "A cat is a better mother." In fact, I am convinced that one of the reasons they left Scarlett's first child, Wade Hampton Hamilton, out of the movie is because in the book you almost forget Scarlett has a child, she pays so little attention to him. She spends her life zealously pursuing a man who is married to another woman, not to mention all the beaus she steals from other girls along the way. When she does the right thing, it is usually for the wrong reasons. She is relentlessly mercenary, always believing the end justifies the means. She marries men she does not love, and continues to dream of another man, even when she is married. She survives, yes, but as Ashley tells her, "Other people survive and still keep their honor."

Consider this: Who would share her food storage with you--Melanie or Scarlett? The subject of food storage came up at a dinner while we were traveling, and the fact was brought up that your food storage would do you no good when a disaster struck unless you were home or at the place where the food was stored. I responded that in a perfect world, first off, everyone would be prepared with stored food and supplies, and wherever you were when disaster struck, someone would share their food storage with you, while other people would be benefiting from your food storage, and we would all end up being fed. Of course, we don't live in that perfect world, but I have always figured that if I am going to starve to death because I shared my food storage, that would probably be a good last deed to have on the record. (I don't truly know whether or not I would do that, though, because as I write this, I'm not hungry.) Scarlett vows never to go hungry again, but does the hunger of others bother her?

Which of them would you ask to babysit your children?

Which of them would you trust around your husband?

Let's contrast Miss O'Hara with Melanie, who manages to see good in everyone, even Scarlett. We see Melanie as weak because she is trusting, humble, unfailingly kind and somewhat naive, as well as not being strong physically. However, she is charitable, a loving mother, a faithful spouse and a loyal friend. In reality, she has a strength of character that Scarlett lacks. So why does the gift shop have a stack of "Melanie" shirts they can't sell?

I believe we need to rethink who we admire from this book and movie. When Melanie dies, Rhett Butler refers to her as "the only truly kind person I've ever known, a great lady." Frankly, my dear, that's the kind of thing I would like someone to be able to say about me. Next time through Atlanta, maybe I will buy the shirt, as a reminder to myself to work on being more of a Melanie.

On the other hand, maybe I'll work on that tomorrow, "because after all, tomorrow is another day."