Is the Glass Half Full or Half Empty?
By Susan Law Corpany

Many years ago when we lived in Florida, my son received a school assignment to select any destination in the world, research it and write about why he would want to visit that place.  He was also to write a letter that would convince the people there to visit south Florida. 

He thought it would be funny to pick a place no one else was going to choose, and he turned in the preliminary paper telling his teacher he was going to research Downey, Idaho — a small town with not much more than a gas station and a convenience store.  There were no maps, no attractions and no travel agency brochures.  There was not even a Chamber of Commerce. 

I obtained the address of the local elementary school and he wrote to the sixth grade class telling them about Florida and soliciting letters to him telling him why he would want to visit their small town. 

One letter was memorable.  It went something like this:

We all know someone like Jason who is quick to pounce on anything imperfect about a situation, a person, a meal.  This trait of looking for the negative can become a habit that blinds us to the good in our lives and in our fellow beings, damaging our relationships and also causing other people not to want to be around us. 

I have experienced times in my life when it seemed nothing was going right, and I saw the world through the lens of negativity, failing to see my blessings and to be grateful for the good things in my life.  One of those blessings was a friend who was trying to help me change my focus. 

After listening to one too many complaint sessions, she took out a piece of paper.  On top she wrote, “Susan’s Blessings.”  She then began to write.  I remember some of the things on that list.

She took a push pin and tacked the list up on my wall in a spot where I would be forced to look at it every day.  I struggled to turn my attitude around.  Driving one day with my son, I mentioned that I wasn’t sure how I was going to afford the new tires we needed for the car.  Thinking of the list, I said, “But at least it’s got air conditioning.” 

We hadn’t gone another two or three miles before I noticed that the air coming out of the vents was no longer cool.  I went home and angrily crossed through one of the items on my list of blessings, sure that my dog was off in the backyard deciding whether or not it was true love or merely infatuation.

Reframing

Even though my life has improved exponentially since then, I still find myself sometimes falling back into old negative habits.  One of the things I have learned from my husband is the art of reframing — turning something around and looking at it from a different angle. 

He is the master of this.  A couple may come to him for counseling with a difficult child, and he will send them away feeling that they are the ones best able to handle the unique challenges presented by their offspring and that their son or daughter is lucky to have them as parents.  He gives them a supply of fresh courage.  Usually nothing has changed in the situation except for their ability to see it differently and believe they can continue to try. 

We were watching the weather channel one evening.  They were interviewing people in the Bible Belt who had survived a tornado by taking refuge in a church.  Many gave credit to God for their safety.  One woman had a particularly unique take on her blessings.  “I thank the Lord for making me a large woman.  I was able to shield my three children from the storm.” 

We laughed, and I said, “Now that’s reframing.  Next time I get on the scale and it shows my weight is up a few pounds, I am going to say, ‘Hallelujah!  Look what a miracle God and Krispy Kreme have wrought in my life!’”

Along for the Ride

As I review my goals for the new year, being more positive is still on the list, along with the other permanent entries of losing weight and decluttering my home.  As a reminder I bought a clear glass mug with a line and writing that proclaims when the glass is half empty.  This is a battle I will continue to fight, as will many of us, as we struggle to be better today than we were yesterday.  We need to give up the notion that everything in our lives will ever be completely to our liking, and increase our appreciation for the good in our lives.  This is the point President Gordon B. Hinckley was making when he quoted Reverend Jenkin Lloyd Jones, who said the following:

Even when the air conditioning goes out.